The bowling season has just come to an end.  It was a disappointing season.  Our State Bank Team is a seasoned team.  That’s a polite way of saying we have a lot of old guys on our team.  The young guys throw the ball 80 mph while us gray haired fellas probably muster about a 40 mph ball speed.  However, we often shine during the end of the season tournament because most of our State Bank team members don’t drink beer or the hard stuff.  The tournament starts at noon and gets over around 8:00 pm.  About half way through the tournament the noise level increases and the bowling scores  decrease for the alcohol drinkers while us old guys who are sucking on  soft drinks maintain our normal scores and a clear headed demeanor.  Later in the day even our paltry normal averages look pretty awesome when compared to our blitzed opponents! 🙂  We often finish high in the standings at the end of the tournaments and several years we even won the championship.  This caused our opponents much consternation as we were not favored to win.  You could hear them mumbling things like ‘sandbaggers’ but it never seemed to  dawn on them that you bowl better when you are sober! 🙂

Well this season ending tournament did not go well for State Bank.  We placed fourth out of five teams.  Looking back at the game film 🙂  I think the problem was that our opponents didn’t have the large number of bowlers they usually had so they didn’t have as much time to drink. They were forced to bowl.  Thus they didn’t get as blitzed.  Next year I think we’ll remedy that situation if I can get State Bank to sponsor several “drinks on the house” activities throughout the early afternoon. 🙂

But in reference to the title of this blog, “Life Has Been a Ball” you are probably asking what’s next?   As bowling is over what will be the next ball in my life?  It will be tiny and white.  I will attempt to hit this ball with a long handled stick with various shaped metal heads at the end of it.  It is probably the most difficult ball game I have ever attempted to play. It is more commonly called the game of golf but when I play it I often refer to it as that !#@?!!*# game!

Golf requires a variety of accessories.  A golf bag is needed to carry the golf clubs.  Tees are required to hold the golf ball when teeing off. I get teed off quite often when I golf. (I just thought I’d throw that little tidbit in as some extra information.)  Also a ball marker is necessary to mark your ball’s position when you are blocking another golfer’s shot on the green.  A golf glove is nice to have but not a necessity. Some golfers use divot removers. I don’t need a divot remover.  To use a divot remover one must hit the ball high into the air and have it drop onto the green making a dent in the smooth surface of the green.  Since I seldom hit the green in such a manner  a divot remover is not a requirement for me.   My normal approach shot usually crawls up to the green and dies on the green’s apron.  My usual comment is “it’s puttable!”

My first memory of a ball probably was when I was very young playing catch with my two brothers.  Then there was my favorite recess game in elementary school we called ‘dodge ball’ which I understand is being outlawed now by many schools as being too dangerous.  Yet the schools think nothing of putting pads on little fourth grade boys and encouraging them to slam into each other as hard as possible.  Who can figure?

As I progressed through elementary and high school I played kickball, softball, touch football, basketball and baseball.  As a farm boy I rode the bus to school and when the bus arrived at school and the door opened many of the boys, myself included, headed to the school playground where a game of softball workup was in progress.  We played until the bell sounded announcing the start of another school day.  I taught ninth grade phy ed for several years and each spring I would introduce softball workup to the students but to my  disappointment the modern child didn’t like the game.

The game of ball followed me to college as well.  Intramural sports became one of my favorite activities (besides studying of course).  Flag football, basketball and softball were the big three, however I also got introduced to tennis and golf.

The first year the intramural soft ball season was going to be fast pitch.  Since the team I played on didn’t have a fast pitcher I volunteered to pitch.  I threw my arm out in warmups so my pitching career came to a screeching halt. Also I went out for the college baseball team one year.  I didn’t make the traveling squad so my only college baseball experience came when our junior varsity team traveled to the Fergus Falls Community Junior College.  My true baseball skills became obvious when I didn’t even start on the JV team.  But in the 9th inning with two out coach sent me in to pinch hit.

As I stood in the batter’s box eyeing the pitcher a thought went through my head, “If I hit the ball out of the park I would certainly impress the coach.  It would secure a varsity position for me for sure!”

The pitcher went into his windup, I crouched readying my bat to swing with power.  The ball came whizzing to the plate and I swung with all my might.  ‘Crack’ went the bat as it met the ball and the ball rose into the air.  Higher and higher it flew and then it began its descent and dropped into the pitcher’s glove.  He didn’t even have to leave the pitcher’s mound!  So ended my college baseball career. 🙁

As Wheaton became my home golf, baseball and softball became activities I enjoyed.  I even became the playing/manager for the Wheaton Red Socks baseball team.  But that did not end well.  First of all I did not like having to decide if I should start myself.  I would have rather had a coach say “Larson, you’re at second today!”

My career ended on a sour note when we were playing Browns Valley during tournament play.  We were behind 3 – 0 in the fourth inning.  We got runners on first and second, both very fast runners.  I was the third base coach when our batter took a time out and he came walking up to me and said, “Coach, I can lay a bunt down and we can move the two baserunners along.”  My first thought was no, you hit away.  But then I thought okay let’s try it.  So I gave the double steal sign which normally during the season they missed seeing.  But not this time. As the pitcher went into his windup both baserunners broke for the next base and were almost standing on it by the time the batter bunted.

What could go wrong? The batter bunted the ball into the air right into the pitcher’s glove. I can still hear the third baseman holler, “Triple play!”  And that’s exactly what happened.  The inning was over as well as my baseball coaching career! 🙁

Hopefully life continues to be a ball.  Heck, I haven’t perfected my boccie ball skills yet and I understand that down south the Snowbirds are wild about a game called Pickleball.  And I almost forgot about ping pong.  Yes, the ‘ball’ future looks bright! 🙂

Until next time.