I’ve got our Christmas letter written and ready to stuff into envelopes and mail. It was quite a struggle to accomplish the writing part this year. Sometimes writing goes quickly and other times it is hard work. This fall the writing was hard work but it got much worse once the letter was finished. Yesterday I began the task of making copies of the original “cut and paste” Christmas letter. The printer on my computer decided to print in slow motion….really slow motion. I called my computer doctor and he decided my printer was in need of retirement……and for $400 he could replace it with a handy- dandy laser printer. That will be necessary down the line sometime but at the moment I decided it would be more important that I complete making 60 double sided copies of my Christmas letter. So Kathie and I donned our sub zero clothing and headed down the snow drifting Highway 27 to Alexandria where I had called ahead and was assured Office Max could make me 60 double sided copies of the Christmas letter. With a 30 mph tail wind we made good time and pulled into the Office Max parking lot ahead of schedule. Then came more bad news. The sales lady at the printing area of the store informed us that the color printer had just gone down and she was waiting for the repair man. She did direct us downtown to a shop called Insty Prints. So we ventured out into the cold, windy parking lot, climbed into the Jeep and went in search of Insty Prints (without a GPS!). We had to travel only about a mile when the store came into view. We pulled up to the curb in front of the store and I got out wondering what kind of outfit I was going to run into as I entered the building. My worries were unnecessary as the most friendly clerk greeted me, quoted a printing price of forty cents/page (Office Max wanted sixty six cents/page!) and off she went to make a sample copy for me to examine. The sample copy was beautiful and in ten minutes I was in the Jeep and on the way home. Insty Prints became my instant hero and we are already planning a return trip next Christmas new laser printer or no new laser printer.
The Christmas letter is a dying form of communication. Our family is one of the few that continue to practice it. I can remember as a kid back on the farm when my Mother sent Christmas cards to relatives who lived far away. She always included several paragraphs updating the reader about our family’s life. So began the Christmas letter! Those Christmas greetings continued for many years until technology created the copy machine. What a break through. Now the same news could be sent to everyone and it only had to be written once and duplicated as many times as needed. Still copy machines were not that easy to get access to in those early years unless you worked in a particular business. School teaching was one of those particular businesses that offered access to a copy machine. And since the statute of limitations has run out for me I can now admit that I sent my first Christmas letters printed with District #803 copy machine, paper and ink! 🙁
The computers and copiers became more sophisticated and as a result the Christmas letter became more sophisticated as well. I mentioned earlier that I am still a “cut and paste” kind of guy. Some of us never progressed and were left far behind, never able to access all the opportunities that the improving technology offered.
The Christmas letter writing phenomena has evolved into a variety of letter styles. The “Minute by Minute” letter describes almost everything the writer did for the complete 365 days. They tend to be very long and must be read over several days. Another letter type is titled “Our Family Is Awesome!” and includes every report card grade, 4-H ribbon winnings, points scored in athletic events, parents promotions, raises, casino winnings and on and on. Reading them tends to bring on depression and a feeling of worthlessness for the reader. “My Accomplishments” letters describe things that were accomplished during the year: a three week safari to Africa, building a sunroom onto the house, re-siding the house and the neighbor’s house too, all the while winning the life insurance salesman of the year award! Reading letters like that tends to lower ones self- esteem. Probably the most difficult letter to read is the one identified as “Catching You Up On My Eight Kids and My Fourteen Grandkids” letter. Then to top it off the writer refers to them by their first names only! Nerve pills and a stiff shot of whiskey(and I don’t normally drink) are required before reading such a letter!
But, alas, the Christmas letter is falling by the wayside and is being replaced by a ‘family picture’. And of course the picture can even include the family pets such as dogs, cats, pigs or boa constrictors. The family is often dressed alike and posing in front of a rustic, old barn door or a large granite rock. Sometimes the ocean is in the background or a majestic mountain. The background is perfect and the family looks perfect. But if we could only include the traditional family Christmas letter along with the picture things would perhaps not be so perfect! The letter might include such things as this: Junior just returned from reform school, he will be joining the army right after Christmas. Our dog Roscoe contacted rabies and bit the postman, the trial will began in February. Dad was rushed to the emergency room this summer when his nail gun misfired and drove a nail through his hand. That kind of information would allow us to look at that picture and realize they’re not that perfect family either and we could all release a big sigh of relief.
The family Christmas letter will always be my favorite but change is a part of life so, like it or not, I’m going to have to get used to receiving those perfect pictures featuring perfect appearing families posing in front of perfect backgrounds. And with that, the time has come for Kathie and I to wish you all a ‘perfect’ Christmas and a ‘perfect’ New Years. 🙂
Until next time.
